Obsessed with politics and news

Can't stand to see me writing, sitting in a room meditating with no outside source of stimulation

 https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/personality-disorders/symptoms-causes/syc-20354463

Crazy thing about being crazy is you dont know it when you are.

 https://overcomingtoxicpeople.com/Narcissists/Narcissistic_Insults_10_Most_Common_Examples.html

Has consistently discarded me for 30 years

 The cycle of leaving and returning is endless and can go on as long as you comply. A narcissist gets bored very easily, and so it’s very hard for them to stay consistently loyal to a single person, so, they continue to move on from person to another and then in a circle again.

https://bornrealist.com/reasons-why-narcissists-often-go-after-the-same-partners-over-and-over-again/#:~:text=The%20cycle%20of%20leaving%20and%20returning%20is%20endless,to%20another%20and%20then%20in%20a%20circle%20again.

the confusing narcissistic sytle of abandonment and return

 https://psychcentral.com/pro/exhausted-woman/2018/01/the-confusing-narcissistic-cycle-of-abandonment-and-return#1

It took a while to discover her cycle of manipulatively abandoning him. Marie did this to generate intense anxiety, panic, and fear in Adam that she would leave. Once she had him wound up, she knew that Adam would do, say or admit to just about anything to get her to come back. This way Marie would not have to reflect on her own insecurities and instead generated self-doubt in Adam. The narcissistic abandonment cycle is as follows:

Feels shame. It begins with the narcissist feeling shame. It could be shame about childhood abuse, the socioeconomic state of their family, an embarrassing moment, or being exposed as a failure, incompetent, unintelligent, or a fraud. Either way, the shame hits them to the core of their deep-rooted insecurity and they have to immediately cover it up.

Avoids & leaves. Instead of turning to a person they love in such moments for comfort or compassion, the narcissist avoids any intimacy for fear of further exposure. Instead, they verbally lash out at the person who is most likely to be supportive. When the narcissist receives any resistance or discomfort, they leave.

Fears abandonment. Even if the departure is for a few minutes, the narcissist suddenly realizes that their exit means further complications. Now, they wont get their daily need for attention, affirmation, affection, and appreciation from the other person. This is worse than shame. Their fear of abandonment by the other person causes the narcissist to overlook any embarrassment.

Returns & promises. When the narcissist returns, there is a grand entrance of sorts. It usually begins with, I hope you are sorry for what you did (said). The focus of the conversation is not about the narcissists behavior, fears, or insecurities; rather it is redirected to focus on the other persons behavior. After soliciting an apology from the other person, the narcissist half-heartedly expresses a minor amount of regret and makes grandiose promises for the future.

Spouse hopeful. Unfortunately, the other person usually swallows the insignificant apology when it is served with lavish gifts, magnificent dreams, and impressive statements. This elaborate expression causes the spouse to overlook the previously abusive behavior as they wrongfully believe this pattern wont repeat.

Pattern repeats. It is only a matter of time before the cycle repeats. Some narcissists almost accidentally fall into this cycle while others use it manipulatively. Even when it is done without evil intent, the positive outcome of the narcissist looking great after hiding their shame becomes a useful tool. Naturally, they will do it again and again because it feeds their ego.

Marie returned to Adam within a few hours. She was expecting him to offer an apology, but he didnt. Instead, he sat in silence until Marie could no longer take it and she exploded again. He still said nothing. Knowing that things were different and her tactics were no longer working, Marie exited the room. The next day, she acted as if nothing happened.

Never satisfied.

WHY are you so happy? says to me or anyone that is feeling good, as if they should be feeling bad.

Doesn't want to do anything for anybody UNLESS he gets money or some physical thing in return. Then says he didn't get enough...gets ripped off

 gets the short end of the stick

Thankless. Grumbles and bitches daily about almost everything

Pays entirely too much attention on the NEWS. Outside stuff focus

 bbc news years ago over 30 

i remember him listening to this crap

today is x22 mike lindell politics trump biden all of that

lost the self amidst the world

https://www.quora.com/

Focus on lack, never enough, not satisfied

I'm NOT STUPID !! :Says this frequently

always tries to outdo me on anything I do or am interested in: to prove they are smarter than me

Sarcastic sardonic mean nasty mocking hateful

Takes over any project I want or start Claims I am incapable, sloppy, stupid, worthless, an idiot.

 says i don't know how to do anything

my work is haphazard sloppy 

i don't work hard enough

i dont know what i am doing

Spends large amounts of money of the SELF. Picks at me for tiny expenses or anything I do that costs money even when I pay for it.

Encourages dependence upon them then lashes out when me, a person needs them for anything.

Can't give credit to anyone else for achievements. Jealous

Dominating. Lashes out at others to feel powerful and important.

NOT suicidal. Chooses to inflict pain upon someone else or some other life form

Feels powerless insignificant. Must condemn others for a sense of control importance

STFU SHUT THE FUCK UP : SD BY NARC NARCOS NARCISSISTS

 ONLY THESE PEOPLE DO THIS

MY MOTHER NEVER EVER TALKED TO ME LIKE THIS

TOLD ME TO STOP TAKING CONTROL OF CONVERSATION 11-17-22 WATERPROOFING APPT

 ALL I DID WAS LISTEN TO INFO FROM THE WORK AND PROPOSAL THEY WERE GIVING

HE SHUTS ME OUT CONSTANTLY.

Porn addiction addicted ECM

RIGID INFLEXIBLE STIFF UNFORGIVING VENGEFUL HATEFUL MEAN SELFISH

EXPECTS INSTANT GRATIFICATION AND RESPECT BUT DOESN'T GIVE IT

LIMITS OTHER BEINGS AS IF THEY ARE IN CONTROL

CAN'T STAND IT IF ANOTHER ONE KNOWS OR FIGURES OUT SOMETHING FIRST

Allows me sleep. Nice to me if I am sick as in flu or a wound can see

Lacks finesse. Doesn't know what a euphemism is

Insults often : Says don't take it personally

Caught up in world of shit. Sucked down the sewer drain

 https://schizophreniaresearchstudy.com/

Just like his mother MLS

 will ruin my happiness if he senses I am doing something enjoyable

any holiday celebrations

any kind of party, get together, group activity

bicycling .. took away my bike because he insisted I had seat way too high for me which was dangerous 

dancing .. ridicules me for liking and doing it

dinners at home, gatherings, DOES not have very often . Doesn't want people over, says it costs too much money each person eats, has to use the toilet and thinks people are snooping through house stealing things

countless incidences of me being at a get together where he came into it and forced me to leave or ruined the situation either during it or afterwards with his fits of rage anger pissed off upset jealousy

How to undo brainwashing

 https://www.psychmechanics.com/how-to-undo-brainwashing/

How to undo brainwashing

Critical thinking reasoning skills logic NOT much there. Not rational.

 suspicious

superstitious

ties in people to a thing and or events blaming them for it occurring being happening 

 https://www.strangulationtraininginstitute.com/all-abusers-are-not-equal-new-ipv-research-reveals-an-indicator-of-deadly-abuse/

I think I can't, can't can't .. it won't work SELF talk

Full of excuses and whining.. when one can't figure out how to accomplish a thing

 tone of voice changes to most irritating sound

whines yells

raises voice screams throws temper tantrum fit 

How to identify a cult

 https://christiancourier.com/articles/how-to-identify-a-cult

How to identify a cult

is acting like this

obsessed with politics, trump, mike lindell, 
gives money to mike lindell organization (buying overpriced items thru the site)

Social reject ?

Beats a constant drum of negativity. Fault finding : Does not look at the self.

Gives me things I don't want them tells me I'm ungrateful and can't be pleased

Believes each person thing and life form exists to please him her. Must fit into the mold

Take it leave me attitude since beginning